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+11 votes
in All The Rest by (1,442,600 points)

22 Answers

+7 votes
Best answer

yes and no

Yes-If one of you is attracted to the same sex

Yes-if one of you is attatched

Yes-if you have been friends since grade school

For every other reason, my answer is no.  For a single man who is looking for marriage, he is looking for a woman he can make his wife.  When men find a lady attractive, they want to get to know her better to see if she is someone they could see marrying.  Friendship is always said to be the basis of a great love.  When either one or the only is attracted, no they cannot be friends.

A man is looking for a woman he can marry, trust, and be vulnerable with.  A man has to be able to trust you to be vulnerable.  Also, men will not be vulnerable just because.  Did he tell you how being left off the basketball team in 6th grade made him feel?  Did he tell you that he is embarassed about the scar on his foot and the story behind it?  Guess what?  He sees you as a potential wife.

Also, women or men should not get upset with the other if they declare their feelings.  If they don't feel the same, appreciate and respect it, and either move on, or don't.

I am sorry, I am not vulnerable with friends.  If I tell you something that noone else knows, I either love you, am falling in love with you, or value and respect you a great deal.

If I am ever in love with you, I can't just be friends because one or both is then not being authentic because feelings are being withheld

by (1,189,840 points)
+5 votes

No, they can't be just friends. Every single man wants every single women in the world sexually. Take a moment and think about it.

by (4,001,011 points)

Best answer.

+3 votes

Yex, I think that men and women can just be friends. I am friends with plenty of men and yes their wives trust us, just as we trust ourselves. They are like brothers and cousins and such.  I even have a male as a best friend. All men do not think about sex all the time,  and if they did,  what is a little fantasy for a second?  LOL! 

by (427,930 points)
+3 votes

No Billy Crystal said it best in When Harry Met Sally:

Harry:"Men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way."

Harry:“Great! A woman friend… You know you may be the first attractive woman I have not wanted to sleep with in my entire life.”

Harry:“No man can ever be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He’ll always want to have sex with her.”

Sally: So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?

Harry:: No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too

by (5,058,010 points)

That last bit is a contradiction in terms.  Unattractive = someone you don't want to shag, surely? 


Apparently that is common male thinking, someone to shag is better than no one to shag. Or so I have been told. But I am not a man so cannot confirm :)


ding ding ding, except the unattractive thing for me.  I am a demisexual, I need a mental and emotional connection before being attracted.  Looks might catch my attention, but they won't make me attracted

+6 votes

Typically when there is no sexual attraction between the two then yes, it flows pretty smoothly. Once it goes there.... to me, the possibility of sex now becomes an underlying thought that could happen again within the realm of variables and opportunities.

by (1,188,780 points)
+4 votes


+5 votes

There is no reason that two emotionally intelligent human beings cannot be friends-even if they are the opposite sex. I can guarantee that every single man and woman who answers this question can name at least 10 women off the top of their heads that they wouldn't want to "bang". Therefore, they could easily continue "just being friends". 

Anyone who says no is implying that every single man and woman are attracted to one another, which is obviously ridiculous.

by (430,580 points)
+5 votes

Yes indeed they can be.  I have a great many friends who are woman, that I have not slept nor want to.  My two oldest friends I have known since I was 14, 40+ years ago. 

One of the two is a woman I have had the pleasure of calling friend.  She married a roommate of mine. Never in all these years have I had the desire to sleep with her.  She is was and still is very attractive, personable, and sexy.

by (2,884,340 points)
+4 votes

I have longstanding male friends.  The idea that men only ever become friends with a woman because they want to do her doesn't make a blind bit of sense to me, because if it was true, wouldn't they have made advances and/or given up and quit being my friends by now? 

by (1,072,000 points)
+3 votes

what blue said!!!

by (3,099,030 points)
+5 votes

Sure.  I have a number of women friends, and have had in the past.

It doesn't mean that I don't want to, or would not, screw them.  Although if they wanted to we could have sex and still be friends.  But I do genuinely like these people and they don't seem anxious to screw me, so I respect that and remain friends.  

Even though I may be the horniest guy on the planet, it doesn't mean that I reject everyone who doesn't feel the same way, and by this time in my life I pretty much expect them to not feel the same way.  But we can be friends.

by (1,524,050 points)
+3 votes

Of course! Obviously I don't know from personal experience, but I do know that I don't want to bone every potential bone-able person who I meet. Just because your sexual orientations match up, does not mean your genitals will.

by (577,690 points)
+3 votes

Of course they can. However, I personally can't imagine myself being close friends with a gal who has me friend-zoned, but I can still remain on friendly terms with her. If she and her significant other and I are also friendly with one another, that makes it even more amenable.

by (562,210 points)
+2 votes

This has already been answered-

by (31,190 points)
+2 votes

Four of my closest friends are straight guys, two of them are single, and I don't wanna fuck them. They might want to fuck me, but I seriously doubt it, we've been friends for years and there's never been anything sexual or romantic between us. So yeah, they can. It's only weird if you make it weird.

by (100,300 points)
+2 votes

no guys want what tehy want no stopping that

by (13,640 points)
+2 votes

Yes, I have lots of attractive female friends ..

And I'm not trying to have sex with them

In all honesty I've turned a few down, because of our friendship, and we are still good friends

by (292,750 points)

Hell I'm even friends with women that I have slept with



+1 vote

Of course they can. All the women I presently know are just friends. And that includes you.

by (743,470 points)

I am referring to actual friends you spend time with in person, talk on the phone, etc.

+1 vote

During 2008 I lived in Reading and carried on a ploutonic releationship with an Italian girl, We just got on really well but did'nt fancy each other. 

by (124,740 points)

Right, there wasn't chemistry.  If one or both were attracted there couldn't be a relationship in most cases.

+2 votes

Umm.  Well...maybe.

If there is no attraction?..possibly.

You are welcome for my definitive answer.  


by (22,180 points)
+1 vote


+1 vote

Yes - I think that even if they have been attracted to each other as long as they haven't been attracted at the same point in time they can be friends. As a straight female, I have a ton of straight male friends at college, and it's never gone any further than just friendship with any of them.

by (640 points)
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