My brother started dating a girl for a few months, from the very begging I knew it wasn’t going to last. She had some serious health issues and he was very neglectful of her feelings/needs throughout. Even more then that they had extremely different personalities which resulted in constant disagreements and arguments with neither of them happy. During this time, I ran into this girl a few times, every time I ran into her I would limit my interactions and force standard boundaries to not engage in too many conversations and just keep my general distance. Something was different about this girl, for some reason her and I were insanely compatible. We had an extremely strong connection to each other: we shared the same views, the small amount of times I saw her people around us would say she was basically the girl version of me. Time develops and she (by her own decisions that I wasn’t aware of) decides to break things off with my brother because they weren’t working, and she was having feelings for me. A month later she reaches out, we start talking, and without even thinking about things I go on a few dates thinking it wouldn’t be a big deal.
As time goes by things started happening between us and I didn’t really know what to do. I had this amazing connection with someone and the more we hung out the happier I became. Naturally we started hanging out more and eventually started dating. This is where I really messed things up… I am not the person who would ever do something like this especially to my own brother, but I started dating her temporarily and figured I would find a time to tell my brother after the fact. A couple months are gone, and I am happier then I ever been, she’s helping me to grow in ways I never before thought possible and I know I am doing the same for her. We went away on a short trip and on multiple occasions we had people tell us they completely understand why were together because we have a real connection which they don’t see often and go on to talk about how strong it is. This is still a strange experience, but we hear it every time we meet new people.
Here comes the dilemma, I go to tell my brother how I feel and that I want to start dating her. During this really long conversation he basically tells me that we will no longer be family and he will basically pretend I don’t exist. (I have always been close to my brother. Unfortunately, my family is really broken. I don’t want to go into details, but I have to constantly stop in on a regular basis to break up fights or put out the regular fire). In his mind this would be the ultimate betrayal and the conversation ended with me being too weak to tell him the reality of the situation.
This is where I am today and I have ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHAT I AM DOING. At this point I feel like I am into deep to break things off (Not that I would ever want to) but I don’t feel like I have the strength to be able to handle this situation and tell my brother. I feel like I have been sitting on the fence to long and I am literally about to explode. It’s becoming unhealthy and I can’t stop feeling like I am drowning