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+1 vote

Just admit to me it was a close fight rather then "ass kicking"

So its late march, And a saturday night party thats at my friends house. Me and the girls spent the afternoon doing our makeup to get ready, this party was at a big house not far off mansion size. 

I talked about the guy i was speaking to and still am now, most the afternoon with girls and i was really pumped for this. But really were a little pissed that bitchy group were coming we didnt really wanna say no as we arent threatened. 

So we discuss footwear, as it was mainly and outside party and the weather was gorgeous. I decided to go for the toe post sandals (which obviously proved to be a fatal error)

The girls mainly went for heels. 

So its gets to 8pm and the chav bitches turn up, like jessica they dress like 15 year old dudes lol, tracksuits and sneekers and are very loud there is arleady 40,50 there at this point. 

But im okay at this point as im chilling in the main room setting up the party games, with jan and mel then my guy turns up who i speak to for a little while and tell him ill catch him when im less busy but to wait for me in the same room.

I then sit down with my friends just after setting up, this is when i see jessica talking to him. I look at mel and go lol as if she thinks she has a chance. But he didnt seem to be too dis interested.

This is where i storm over and i mean storm, I tell him to stop talking to her as she is a little chav and "beneath my level in more ways then one". She then replies calling me "stuck up bitch, with orange feet".

She then goes on to tell me how shell do what she likes, so i tell her she looks a mess and to watch how she talks to me or shell regret it.. 

She replies "okay pyshco, but like who wears sandals in march" i smile before she turns her back.. I then grab her hair with one hand and start genuinely laughing at her. I then saw the bucket out the corner of my eye.. by this point her friends are back in So i look at them and keep laughing I get jessica right over the bucket at which point i say something along the lines of..

"Enjoy your drink, drink up"

At which point as i go to push her head down she stomps my feet with her sneekers, lose my grip as im stunned for the split second she then pushes my head down and dunks me into the bucket.

I remember thinking omg omg omg omg no no no as i was under and taking in mouthfull of custard after another. I came up coughing and coughing and coughing i then storm out of the room custard faced and straight to the bathroom where mel quickly follows me "you gonna let her get away with that", without noticing i still had shit in my mouth and was spitting that out and i turned to her and went "did i win" to which she actually laughed and went "no, no anything but", she then passed me a towel and i dried myself luckily not much went in my hair as i had it tied right back. I then confront her as to how i lost. As i go down i walk passed the chavs were they go "tut tut tut tut did you enjoy your drink" apparently the tuts were the loud noises  i was making whilst under never been more mortified, i also felt a little dizzy and i made my way home. 

in Relationships by (51,950 points)

2 Answers

+2 votes

Thank you for summarizing the story once again... I had completely forgotten the details... LOL

by (347,060 points)

Right? It was close admit it.


No... It wasn't close. 


How wasnt it exactly i was dominant at first 

Were you never spanked as a kid? 


+2 votes

You don't really want to hear this.

But close only matters when playing horseshoes, hand granades, and nuclear weapons.  You lost.  You came in second out of two.

And you lost even with the element of surprise on your side.  You grabbed her from the back without her even knowing what was going on.  And you still ate custard.  It is tough to lose a sneak attack, but you did.

I hope you are not, but you come across as a stuck up, snobbish, juvenile bimbo.  I am pretty sure that everyone was happy to see you get yours.

It is not up to you who your guy talks to.  And if he is interested.  If you are half as interesting and good looking as you claim, you should have the confidence that your guy will.return to you.  

To review.  You didn't get your ass kicked, but probably only because she didn't think of it while you were head down ass up in the custard bucket.

by (1,411,350 points)

What does head down ass up mean? She didnt because id of kicked hers. Im far from stuck up i cant help being pretty and tough. Also there was no sneak attack.


It means your head was down in the custard.  That made your ass as the most prominent, and sort of highest target for her foot, should she have decided to use it.

Sorry, I read that as she turned her back and you grabbed her hair.  But going back, I see it was before she turned her back.  My mistake.  Thats what happens when you get old.  You don't read all the words.

You still struck first, but she wasn't back to you.


Why would people being staring at my ass? That would be quite rude. 

No She did turn her back then i grabbed her, it was better to do so then


To see if she was going to kick it.  Lol.  Ahh, so it was a sneak attack.  In the old west US, it was considered cheating to shoot anyone in the back.

Really embarrassed now more didnt realise my ass would be hanging out for all them dudes to garp at. Argh. I didnt cheat at all she did for toe stamping thats cheating.

Would guys really of been staring


Lol.  Given the chance.  Guys will always stare at a woman's ass.


Cheating is in the eye of the beholder.  Usually the winner decides who has been cheating.  I guess we need to ask her. Lol

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