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+2 votes

have met this guy 3 years ago. We talk everyday and know everything about each other. It started as flirting and sexting and he even used to see me as a potential but now we're just friends. I always had feelings for him so I decided to tell him and he said we're good as friends and he wants to keep that. How do I get him to see me more than friends? How do go back to where things started? I can't live without him but I want more than just friends.  I just don't get it, why wouldn't he want a relationship with me if he thinks I'm funny, great company, he trusts me a lot and finds me attractive. We have a lot in common and are really good fit and I know he even told me he wants me to always be a part of his life. So why are not in a relationship already? If this isn't love than I don't know what it is.  The fact that we weren't always just friends is giving me some hope that he might change his mind and see me again as a potential.  I was thinking about asking him if we can flirt again because I miss doing this with him and see how it goes? Any advice?

in Relationships by (150 points)

6 Answers

0 votes

You can’t really “get” another person to see you the way you want them to. What you CAN do is let him  know you like him and are interested in him. Maybe make the first move and just ask him out. Then he’ll either see you as a potential romantic partner or he won’t. If he does, cool!  If not, at least you know and can move on. 

by (2,200,030 points)
+2 votes

Tell him he turns you on sexually. Then sit back, relax and watch the reaction.

Life is what you make it.

by (3,691,251 points)

we talk a lot about sex and even ask each other about our preferences etc... do i just text him this when we're chatting?


A text would be perfectly good. But keep in mind it's not what you do but the way you do it.


what do you mean? could you please elaborate?


I'm talking about style. It comes naturally to some. Others have to work on it.

+1 vote

It seems he has “friend zoned” you.

Meaning you have earned  his trust as a friend but doesn’t see you as a sexual partner.

Why you ask does he not see you that way if he finds you attractive.

Well some men have a specific type or style of woman that sexually excites them.

Sometimes it is a buxom blonde, girl next door, or well tanned athletic sporty chic. The list is endless. I don’t think any of us can logically explain our preferences.

On the other hand are men who are pure horn dogs who will hump any available female anyplace anytime.

It appears your friend is not the latter.

I hope this gives you some insight.

The Leftists have left us!

by (671,320 points)
+1 vote

You are sure that he is not gay?  

Otherwise, if you can talk about anything, ask him why he doesn't want to have sex with you.  Tell him you would really like to have sex with him.  Sometimes you have to push the elephant out into the room.  There has to be a reason why he doesn't want to get naked and enjoy screwing you.  Most guys that I know would do that whether they were interested in long term relationship or not.  Friend with benefits, you know.

I don't otherwise know.  Funny, sexy, attractive, etc, and really wants to get under the guy, sounds perfect to me.

by (1,345,630 points)
+1 vote

For some reason he wants you as a friend and not a girlfriend. You can't  force feelings on him he may not have, and you have to accept it, hard as that may be. 

   If he knows how you feel about him, is there a way you can ask him nonchalantly,  "What about me for a potential partner? " You can be honest and say you are curious as to why he would not want you as such. But my feeling is being you have known him 3 years now, that perhaps you both have been around each long enough for him to see you more like a sister to him, and not a girlfriend. I know thats not the answer you want, but that's how I see it. 

The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.       -Socrates

by (861,220 points)
0 votes

I think asking him if you can flirt again is a good idea.  Even if he says no, I think I'd do a little if I were you.  

I think there's a legitimate fear in his mind that getting romantic puts what you have now at risk.  

by (879,580 points)
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