29W in a relationship with a 27M for about a year a half now. Video games have always been a source of difficulty in our relationship, or rather the amount of time he spends on them. For weekday nights, he generally spends 3-4 hours playing with his friends. He does stop at 9:30 generally to have time with me before bed (about an hour), but the ratio of game time to our relationship time is a struggle for me. It's generally worse on the weekends. He will generally play 6-7 hours on Fridays, and 8-10 hours on Saturdays and Sundays if we don't plan on any activities together.
I know this is is his way to destress, and work has been very difficult for him lately. I honestly don't want to be one of those girlfriends who is needy and not understanding. Am I being unreasonable in wanting more time with him? Or really, wanting him to want more time with me rather than games? Whenever I talk to him about this, he usually gets defensive and claims that I don't want him to spend time with his friends. He says he's an introvert and needs time to recharge in order to give energy back to me. I want all those things for him as well, but it's the extent in which he says he needs gaming that I question. I don't know if his view on his own needs is actually accurate.
In addition to this, video games are his only primary interest, which often makes connecting with him difficult. I hear him playing with his friends, and can, to my embarrassment, get jealous of the comradery and fun he has with them that I don't often get to have with him (I'm not a gamer, so I'm more frustrated when I play then engaged). I've asked him if he might have interest in other hobbies outside of gaming so that I can connect with him more, and he has yet to pursue any. I'm a pretty independent person, and am fine at times with the alone time I get in my relationship, but I find myself feeling more and more that something is off and that there might be more that I could have in a relationship instead of feeling like I'm in a relationship with someone who's in a relationship with gaming. I want to be understanding, but without him having a friend group I can do activities with or hobbies that I can connect with him on, it's making our relationship increasingly difficult. He in turn often does now have much interest in my own hobbies (he doesn't enjoy the TV shows I like to watch or books I like to read or podcasts and puzzles I like to do), though he periodically tries.
Am I being unfair towards him and expecting too much? Or could he possibly be addicted to gaming? His work performance is not suffering, but we also haven't had sex in a few weeks. I am open to all advice! Please help. I want to make things work, but I'm not sure how.