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+3 votes
29 views

I matched with this guy on tinder back in October. We never met up before but we were texting everyday. In April, I matched with this other guy on tinder. When we matched, he gave me his Instagram. When I went on his Instagram to follow him, I saw that the guy who I matched with in October follows him. Not only that, but they're also friends. We would DM each other from time to time. No flirting. Just friendly, normal conversation.

A month ago when the pandemic was still kind of bad, I told the guy who I matched with in October that I wouldn't break quarantine to see a guy until this was all over. Now that NYC has reached phase 2, I have been seeing my friends. The guy who I matched with in April and I made plans to see each other on Thursday but I had an interview for a hospital so we didn't meet up. Right after my interview, I texted the guy who I matched with in October that I had an interview in a hospital because we're both nurses. He left me on read for a couple of hours and didn't reply back to me until a couple of hours later. I texted him and he left me on read and never texted me back since then. It's been 2 days. The other day, I saw that he unliked a few of my pictures and ever since he left me on read, he stopped watching all my stories. Does the guy I matched with in October know that I was supposed to see his friend or is his behavior not related to me making plans to see his friend? What should I do?

in Dating by (320 points)

4 Answers

+1 vote

God grief you dont half complicate a completely uncomplicated issue.

None of your matches should even register as anything other than a virtual match. He shouldn't be mad about anything you do and you dont get to wonder what he is up to...until you ask him and actually meet.

As far as I'm concerned all you have done so far is speak like we are doing now, however, you dont need to know who I'm speaking to next. 

Internet dating wasn't a thing in my day, I dont have an issue with it because we all lead such busy lives these days and meeting someone the traditional way seems more difficult. What I just don't  get is how on earth a match can mean anything other than a like to get to know you. There is to  much projection with it and we end up advising people who are heartbroken after not seeing someone!!!


Good luck on the interview though, I have a deep respect for nurses 


No man has a  right to fix the boundary to the march of a Nation...

by (2,869,200 points)
0 votes

I think he took your "not breaking quarantine until this is done" as an agreement you wanted to meet.  Daily communication and this idea may have made him think thing were more than they are.  If/when he found out you had plans to meet with his friend without having said anything to him about now being ready to meet he may have taken that as a slight.  If this not replying is a new thing, yes, I think he found out.  Only thing you can do is be honest about it with him and see what happens...

by (917,290 points)
0 votes

He's un-liking your pictures.  He's ignoring your messages to him.  That's pretty clear.

Move on.  Leave the door open if he wants to initiate conversation in the future, but shrug off this "connection" as having been short-circuited. Continue to communicate with his friend as you have.  If a problem develops between him and his friend, that's THEIR problem, not yours.  Live your life.

ago by (704,830 points)
0 votes

Obviously, he's after getting odd over you talking to his friend. Even if it is online, I can understand how quickly these things can get so real so fast. But he had his chance with you and he's blown it now. Why didn't he keep talking to you so much from Oct to April you didn't have time to talk to anyone else? I know a couple who chatted online for a year, [became so involved with the person they introduced me to them on Skype!], moved country and flew to meet them and got married. You can easily get snapped up, unless he's keeping you entertained during Quarantine, which you did. His loss. He's a sore loser. 

If it was a big emotional connection for the both of you something like this would have happened. It just didn't for whatever reason - maybe it just wasn't meant to be.

It's easy to overthink this one, but don't bother and move on. Date the other guy. You're a free spirit until someone claims you and you both agree to be exclusive, or have some little chat about it, which didn't happen.

ago by (4,320 points)
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