Oh sure. We share many traits. Except the wife and I are both the same age. We have separate bed rooms, which is a blessing and a curse. And we are basically roommates. We have not had sex for over 15 years. Lol, I have long thought that having a wife 10 years younger would be better. She might still be interested in sex.
Which I believe is the heart of the problem. Sex was always important to me, she knows that. Never very important to her. It is easy to not be affectionate to your roommate. You have to be civil. But I feel that if she cared about me at all, she would at least touch me. That is what prompted the separate bedrooms. I was keeping her awake with self sex, so it was easier to go somewhere else. We have talked about it. She says she never refuses, which is a lie, but if she does anything she acts like it was the ultimate sacrifice and I should be forever grateful. To be honest, if it wasn't for the sign of caring it would not be worth it.
On another issue, it might be the same, my wife thinks that I am basically incompetent for life, and so when we travel I get a constant stream of criticism. She is negative about evetything. Sometimes I lash out and then she sulks for a week. I have just learned to do the best that I can and try to enjoy myself, but ihave learned to never drive. She ends up screaming at me by the end of the day. Maybe, one or both of you are the same.
When we try to talk, she never wants to listen. If a tv show is on, she tells me she is watching. If I wait for a commercial, she is suddenly listening to that. I tell her to let me know when a good time to talk would be, she gets angry. The easiest solution is to not say anything. You might be having a similar problem.
Overall, I am stuck with the situation. It could be worse, nobody is abusing anybody.
Advice. Sure. Find something to do that doesn't involve him. Just resign yourself to roommate status. There is freedom in that. You are working, surely some of those people could be friends. Find an interest away from home. Librarys are good. Volunteer at places. A friend of mine finds people, mostly women, to help at a church he goes too. Any number could be friends. Sports are good, besides being healthy. Or the gym/spa. You just need to accept the situation and live your own life. Worst that can happen is that he will divorce you.
It is true that I waited much to long, like you. I kept hoping that it would improve. But at this point in my life, I don't think that is a viable solution. It might be for you.