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+2 votes
72 views

 I am going to try to make a long story short. But lately I have had literally 10 people come to me crying and depressed and I hate it. I hate it because I hate seeing them like that. It breaks my heart and then an emotion of angers comes over me because I want to help them but I can’t! I don’t know what to do. I try to lend them a supportive hug and listen to them. But it doesn’t seem to help. They become more depressed and then repeat their issues to me where I get the impression they want me to fix their issues but the problem is, I can’t! Even if I wanted to I can’t. Then some of them will express that they are upset but don’t know why!  So then again I am trying to show them support. It’s beginning to dwell on me, I am beginning to feel run down by all this and its starting to affect me. I don’t know what to do and I feel awlful. This is a mix of friends and family! So I can’t turn away from them. I’m torn. 

in Relationships by (8,510 points)

3 Answers

+3 votes

You are not required to be anyone’s shrink. As if you could. You are most likely not trained or educated in how to handle folks complex mental issues.

Often people are depressed and need medication to cope with chemical imbalances in their brains. Antidepressants, anxiety medications etc are not within you ability to prescribe for them.

Be kind, empathetic and if it goes on for an extended period of time suggest that they speak to their GP about their depression. Counseling can help a lot for people who are conflicted about their life’s circumstances. I would ask them if they might consider either of those two options. If not you can honestly tell them you are at a loss on how to further help them. It’s not mean to refuse to be their enabler.

If they persist, tell them it’s all you can do to keep yourself straightened out!

by (809,880 points)
+1 vote

You've got to look after yourself first. In fact, you're not in a good position to help others until you do. Saying no is a big problem for a lot of people but you may have to. You can only do so much at the end of the day and you're not a doctor.

by (4,081,911 points)
+1 vote

Agree with the two people above. You can say something like, "You know, I'd love to help, but I can't. You need to talk to someone else who can, such as a professional couneslor. Good luck with it. " Smile, and walk away.  There are times you have to say no to help, and this is one of them. 

by (1,111,460 points)
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