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+1 vote

We met 2 weeks ago and started texting. We had sex few times as well when he would come over to my house.

he was always very responsive to my texts and complimenting me and sending blushing emojis etc. He proposed going to a one week getaway together and we went. We had plenty of sex, fun and it was great.

However, after the holiday, he started coming less on whatsapp and when I asked him to be in a relationship , he said he's not ready to be in one and started leaving me on read.

Now he ghosted me completely

Why did he do this and why go on holiday with me if he didn't want anything?

in Dating by (23,480 points)

7 Answers

+2 votes

He merely wanted sex! He as much as said so on the first date asking for a getaway week. There was your sign!

He sent compliments and emoji’s to keep the sex going! And it worked, well until it didn’t and you suggested a relationship which he obviously wanted no part of!

So he ghosted you!

Next time you have a friend with benefits don’t ask for a relationship! Ok?

by (893,660 points)

What do you mean.?? He said he wanted to go to a summer getaway. He didn't say sex??

0 votes

Let's do the easy part first.  You went on a holiday together, had a lot of sex, enjoyed it, and enjoyed the holiday.  So that was good.

The next part is easy too.  He did this because he found you attractive, pretty good in bed, and fun.  He enjoyed screwing you and you seemed to enjoy screwing him.  Everything seemed good.

Now we get to expectations.  You were expecting that he would find how much fun you are and decide that he couldn't live without you.  He was expecting you to be this months sex partner, where you have a good time, and want to repeat as as often as you could.

But sometime during the week, between sex and dinner, or dinner and sex, you let it slip that you didn't think that just being fucked  was what you wanted out of life.  He made note of that and started disengageing from you as soon as he could.  You ask for a relationship, he ran.  

by (1,605,950 points)

But why do this??? Hook ups don't go on holidays,


Why not?  I thought hookups were one time things.  Or at best whenever possible.  But a holiday gives a couple a chance to screw their brains out with no one saying anything.  You want to have sex first thing in the morning, go for it.  You want to fuck after breakfast, just do it.  Maybe a little slow romantic sex befor lunch, why not.  Maybe a walk around town with some serious sex when you get back,sure.

You cannot do that for a hook up after work or school.  So a holiday is perfect.  Al! The sex that you want, and find out about the other person.


Yes do then it will lead to a relationship?


No. A mans penis is not actually connected to his brain.   Although after sex, I always loved everyone.   So a happy penis doesn't necessarily translate to a romantic relationship.  Most guys can and will screw anybody who spreads their legs and not feel anything emotionally about it.  Except maybe, "wow, she was really good, I wonder if I can get into her again?".  At some point it is " are you who he was looking for? ". And frequently he was only looking for someone to fuck. 


But why would you say this??


Say what?  I am a guy.  I know guys.  I know how they think.  What don't you understand?


How guys think?


What kind of girl will capture his heart?


Most guys are willing to satisfy their penis.  The penis wants to be in a vagina.  So most guys try to get it there.  They will do or say anything to achieve this goal.  It isn't difficult to understand.

0 votes

Some guys absolutely use this play "let's take a trip" to make a girl super excited and into him and be more willing to have sex with him and only him for a short designated period of time, and then move on. He didn't bring up that his reason was just for sex because he knows his odds of you saying yes go down significantly if he is honest that he just wants a lot of sex and nothing more. You caught feelings, he didn't.

by (73,000 points)

But how can he not catch feelings???

Oh boy. Guys aren't like women in that they only have sex IF they also have emotional attachment, or that they grow emotionally attached if they have sex. It just doesn't work like that. This is why there is tons of advice out there about how women should not have sex with men expecting them to catch feelings. Women should just have sex with men just to have sex with them. And if you can't have sex without catching feelings, then be more selective with who you have sex with. Wait longer to get to know a guy, gain that connection, make sure he truly HAS caught feelings for you before you have sex. For women, sex and emotions are very closely connected. For men, this is not always the case, they can compartmentalize sex apart from emotions. I am grossly generalizing here, but that's the jist of it.

An accurate description.  You know guys.  Lol

0 votes

You should've asked these questions about intentions before having sex. Unless you only wanted sex without strings, he's ghosting you because he told you already he doesn't want a relationship. Doesn't matter it was a holiday, sex happens all week. 

by (1,231,190 points)

He came online a couple of times yesterday but that was it. He was gone after 8.40 pm.

But will he avoid all his friends just to ghost me?


Sounds like he's only ghosting you. 

+1 vote

You tend to have this same repetitive relationship (or lack of one) with the boys you meet.  You meet them, have sex with them, and then are amazed when they don't show that same interest in your that they had in your before you had sex with them.

This should be a clue.  Figure it out.  If you can't figure it out, try reading this:

If you don't find an answer there, then I don't think you'll find one.

by (899,260 points)
0 votes

All he wanted was the sex, he got it and now he’s done. 

by (2,496,790 points)
0 votes

Are you crazy?

by (4,256,451 points)

What's crazy in this?


I was just asking in general.

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