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I’ve been knowing that I’m pregnant for a little over 3 weeks. My boyfriend was the first person i told. He just seemed so excited and we have been talking about the baby. Not much but we have been talking about a baby shower and saving etc. 

Yesterday my boyfriend asked to borrow $20 which isn’t much but i have him a hard conversation about the importance of saving at a time like this. The conversation led to an argument to where he said “you’re doing better than me financially, you have all this money etc”

I asked him did he want the baby : And he admitted he just wasn’t ready for a baby right now and then he followed by you’re not ready either 

I immediately burst into tears. Because i really want to keep my baby. I couldn’t see me killing it even though I’m only 7 weeks. This might be my only opportunity to have a child so i really want to raise it. 

He argued with me for an hour over the phone and told me we both weren’t ready especially him. He told how i had all these great things going on and how a baby would set me back and that he didn’t have real income and that i should understand 

TL:DR; my boyfriend wants us to have a baby later but I’m already pregnant

in Dating by (1,550 points)

2 Answers

+1 vote


I admit I was touched when I read your post here.  However, I looked back at one of your previous posts--from May 2021--and was certainly surprised.  Here's what you wrote:

I’ve been [28M] sleeping with my ex just to find out she’s in a relationship and pregnant [26F]?


I believe you are more full of baloney than baby.  

by (933,340 points)
“Girls will be boys and boys will be girls”

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“Except for Lola!”

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0 votes

Based on these details, my feelings will be on trusting that you gave us all the truthful details without further questioning our answers here.

With that, my opinion is this; one or more  disagreements shouldn't change the dynamics of having a baby. It's best to first calm down, be mature, and have a healthy conversation on how you're both feelings. Anger can change everything so take the time to calm down. 

Ultimately, if you're going to stay together things will work out. It will only work though with mutual respect. You both sould be able to talk about your feelings, and concerns as partners anytime. However, no one, including your partner, has the right to manipulate you into making a decision you're uncomfortable with or unwilling to do. That will only lead to later regret.

To continue with my opinion. Keeping abortions, as low as, possible should always be the common goal here or there no matter what. Abortions are actually at the lowest numbers in decades because of support agencies, such as Planned Parenthood, and other family planning institutions that provide free family planning for women and/or couples like you. You both need to seek education regardless. Go for the free advice/counseling and follow a comprehensive plan now and going forward. This will Include education on adoption laws, and/or rhe economic incentives that can assist low-income mothers and fathers like you. Best to seek this education not only for now but for your future.

by (380,000 points)
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