Tony, I would seriously think about the situation, what led to her being your ex, and simply follow your heart. Don't overthink things or make it all about you. Rarely do things go as you think, but they end up where you're supposed to be eventually. Let kindness lead the way. Start off on other interesting and positive topics, and see how things go. Reminiscing about good things is always a positive. Seize the moment with her.
As for me, Christmas is the perfect time to be with family and friends of all ages. And, especially to help out those less fortunate. That's exactly what we do each year by providing food to area food banks, and city mission. Each year we cook a large Thanksgiving feast for Thanksgiving, and a traditional Italian feast for Christmas. I invite my own family and random friends to my home, and all those who help out on their own accord at the city mission. My family/parents started this back in 1984. I've encourage this act of giving to many along the way. With each year we add a few more hands. Unfortunately, I lost my loving husband to cancer this past July, he is missed and will be missed by many. Those he touched will be asking me where his BIG heart is. I will tell them he is still with us but in a different way.
To pay it forward is a very rewarding act. I thank my parents who always provide me with the continued inspiration to follow in their footsteps. To give love in this way is unsurpassed. 'Tis the Season.